Developmental psychology makes broad generalizations, so open your mind to thinking in terms of patterns over decades of time. This is very different than considering individual mindset.
The primary learning that we’re going for here in this module is that certain things in life can only be learned with age and experience. When two teenagers decide to get married, they have no idea what they’re getting themselves into and you can’t explain it to them either, at least not in a way that hits home.
They just have to go through it, come out the other side of their learning curve, look back, and then they get it, uh, or then it’s possible for them to get it. Uh, there’s no technique in the world that can give them what they’re missing in this case, which is life experience and this life experience takes time as we go through it.
If we’re willing to take responsibility for ourselves and learn as much as we can along the way, then we’ll develop maturity and character. But there’s no substitute for that process. And it’s not a given. The passing of time and the having experiences does not necessarily lead to personal growth. Uh, it’s possible that, uh, we go through all of this and really not learn the lessons we need to learn and grow and character and be, and apply the experiences that we have in a useful way.
Nevertheless, that time and experience is necessary if we are to learn and grow. And it’s for those people who are so inclined. The reason why we need to understand the developmental stages that we’ve outlined in this module is to know what to do when, when we’re working with people or when we are considering or considering our own lives, when we have a broad understanding of where we are in life, we know what goals are appropriate, which needs to satisfy, what not to worry about yet the things that we can let go of because it’s too late.
And when we’re communicating with people or helping others to grow and develop, do you can know which goals of theirs are realistic and appropriate for their level of development. So you’re not trying to work with them to satisfy goals that are unrealistic at that time. It’s like a 20 year old kid coming up to you. And his goal is to run a company within the next two to three years.
Um, you know, it’s not gonna happen.
He’s not gonna run the large organization that he is a salesperson for in two to three years. Now you could say, Mike, I know one kid who did, okay, that may be one kid and a million, but for the most part, I would not sign on to helping a kid run a corporation and lead large teams of people without letting him know that he, he needs learn and grow and develop through the process of gaining experience.
So it’s really important that we understand these developmental stages for a number of reasons. There’s nothing in NLP with the techniques that we learn that says, here’s when to apply this, here’s when not to apply this, here’s where it’s appropriate and here’s where it’s not appropriate.
NLP as this broad range of techniques at the practitioner level, that lack of context for appropriateness in and of themselves. And so at the ILP center, we are the only NLP training organization that puts the process of personal growth in the context of developmental psychology. And it clarifies so much, but it all begins with understanding the model and learning to apply it to people. And that’s what we’re here to do.